Unravelling The Mystery Of Life

"Accident is the name of the greatest of all inventors."
Mark Twain

I thought I understood. But then the veil of what I thought I understood was lifted and I came to know the profound truth. I knew very little about hardly anything.

Shall I explain?

I think I became concussed for a decade, walking around in a fog that began when I fell, headfirst, from fourteen feet.

It's fair to say that on that day, it wasn't just my skull that got smashed. My whole life shattered. It was then that I entered the time warp - a period where I thought I understood things, but clearly didn't.

Following the tragedy I thought I'd been reborn. In a sense I guess I had. The illusions of my life shattered and I realised that: marriage didn't always last forever, accidents do happen, death could arrive at any moment and some people find honesty difficult.

You could say, I woke up. But then I might say, 'Yes, but only to a new sleep'.

The reason I might say this is that my thoughts were building new references to a new reality where I thought I had all the answers. Meantime my nervous system was rewiring and endeavouring to dull down my already hurt feelings.

In my new reality I had doubts. I had fears. I had trust issues. I often couldn't be bothered. I listened to music at full volume. I watched too much TV - even programmes that didn't entertain me. Sometimes the stereo and the TV would be on together. I drank too much on occasions and overate.

And for a time, all the noise and stuff in my life took over.

But then this veil - this decade of concussion lifted and I could see the benefits of this whole experience. I could see how I'd been born into an illusion where security and permanence of structure and stability existed.

Beyond that I could then see how disillusion of fear and failure and insecurity.

Having seen both sides of my opposite I came to the conclusion that all I needed to do now, was decide what I liked best and create a new illusion.

It's hard to see through the noise and stuff and it can be hard to decide what you want your idea of life, your illusion to be about, especially when life turned tough.

When things go wrong, it's hard to not blame, either yourself or others. It's often impossible to see the blessing in times of hardship. We can, and do, beat ourselves up. Make ourselves feel less.

But I, and I hope you, will see when you look back at the time warp of your life, that a very special person passed through the adventure of our life and had some pretty awesome experiences.

When we take the time to identify with that passing person and see them as us and understand what's been happening we can begin to understand what's unfolded in our life. When we know that we will understand how to straighten out any kinks.

Sometimes situations begin, as mine did, with an accident. That accident could be looked at as a curse or a blessing. When you look at it as a curse, the future clouds over. When you look at it as a blessing, the canvas is clean and the future is hopeful.

Recently I was working with someone who told me how his life was a mess. Yet following the events of his life, I could see clearly it wasn't. It was a tapestry of amazing events, all orchestrated to guide him. Yet he'd been missing the guidance and was therefore in pain.

When I unravelled the mystery he'd been living, I saw him relax and put his hand on his chin. He wagged his finger at me, but couldn't find words. And then he smiled and I knew he had, at last seen through his mist.

From that moment on he was enabled to recreate his illusion, to begin to make of life whatever he wanted.

Understanding and hope is what he took away from our session. His life had unfolded. His future begun.

With love and good wishes

Neil

Five Tips For Self-improvement and Personal Growth

If you are looking to improve the way that you feel about yourself, there are many things that you can do to give you the self-confidence that you need to help make your life better. You will need to think about what you need to improve on and what you can change about your life.

Try not to worry about things that you cannot control. If you are looking to make your life better because you are not happy with it, this is something that you can control. You can make your life what you want it to be and there is no one to blame for the things that you do not like except for you. It is your life, and you need to make it work for you.

There are so many ways that you can give yourself self-improvement. You do not have to sit back and let life go on in the way that you do not want it to. You deserve to be happy. So consider these five simple instructions to help get you there. They are things that you can do easily for yourself so that you are living your life to the fullest each day.

* First you should know that you are great. You are someone that deserves to have the very best in life. You really have to believe this so that you are able to make the most of your life. You need to make sure that you are doing what you need to so that you have what you want and need in your life. You will have personal growth through knowing that you are someone that is worthwhile.

* Second you should remember that unless you are good to others, you would not be self-fulfilled. You need to be sure that you have the generosity to give others dignity and respect. You want to be sure that you are decent to others. This will help you develop and grow into the kind of person you want to be. This is very important even though it gets lost a lot in the world today.

* Third of all, you will want to achieve the goals that you set for yourself. Having goals is very important. You will want to make sure that you have all your goals set out in front of you and know what is important. You will want to be sure that you have the guts and the readiness to go out there and get what you want and deserve.

* The fourth thing that you can do for personal growth and self-improvement is to work hard at what you do. When you are accomplishing things in life, you will feel better and want to achieve more things. You need to make sure that you are putting your best effort first so that you can have the strength to go out and get what is waiting for you.

* The fifth thing that you need to do for personal growth is be open to other ideas. The ideas that you have in your mind are not the only ones out there. You have to be willing to listen to others and take what they have into consideration. You will want to be open to how others feel and take their feelings into consideration. This is so important because you want to feel good about how you treat others and what you can do to make them feel good. This will give you personal growth and improve your personality as well.

Me And My Ofice

If asked, define your workplace, what would your answer be. A place that that's fun, exciting and stimulating or one that's staid and dreary. Most likely we will go with the second description. Ever wondered, why? Why we have to get up every morning or even night and force ourselves to go to a place which, given a opportunity we might set fire to but then we know life is cruel and not all our dreams come true.

What makes our workplaces so boring and arid? To start with we need to understand that
offices are mini societies and we have a role to play in it. The air might be serious and formal but that doesn't imply that we become android, in the way we think and act. Workplaces need discipline, but one that doesn't try to alter our personalities to the extent that we start feeling that we are loosing ourselves and trying to be something we are not.

Irrespective of where we are, we will still be humans and exhibit aspects of our personalities, good or bad. We often forget that we are dealing with real people in our workplaces and not mere human resources. Interactions here are of a more complex nature as one has to be politically correct and abide by the rules, nevertheless at the end of the day we are dealing with human emotions. It is in this context that behavioral aspect of a employee becomes important. It is not rocket science, it simply means that we pay attention to things that matter to us and have a direct relation with the way we conduct ourselves and how we perceive different people and situations in our workplaces.

Our attitude, anger, stress management abilities, interpersonal skills, communication skills, leadership qualities, emotional intelligence, being introvert or extrovert and like all have a major role to play in creating a world around us where we can be at peace with it or just dislike it. When we don't get along with our colleagues or when our seniors seem to be finding us incompetent for all the wrong reasons, instead of frowning and getting annoyed with them we should endeavor to understand what are the real reasons behind their behaving in that manner. Sometimes, people might have genuine problems which we fail to see or the person in question has a problem outside the office or maybe some people just like it that way as it is their only way of getting attention. There could be several reasons, it is upto us to decide whether we really want to solve this mystery that is getting obscure everyday or want to leave it unresolved.

Remember, you can make the difference. Be nice to people and yet be firm. Try to make your workplace that you don't loath going to, make it a place, which has warmth and relaxes you and your friends and is fun to work in. It is easier said than done, with the deadlines to be met, clients calling in, reports to submitted, getting late for an appointment and all that goes on in a regular office but that's what work is all about. Its up to us to learn to handle the situations positively and come out learning something new from them, however small. It takes a lot of practice, perseverance, the right attitude and most important of all the willingness to do so. It is all in our hands and it all starts with questioning ourselves- what kind of world have I created around myself, because what we give is what we get.

Alcohol and Drug Abuse in Teens

Alcohol and drug abuse is largely detected amongst teens. This could be contributed to many things. The main ones would of course be peer pressure and how they were raised. Peer pressure will always be around and it is best to let your child know the dangers of these actions instead of trying to shelter your teen. They are going to find out unless you lock them in a closet till they are 18. Imagine how a sheltered person will act when released into the wild. The possibilities are endless. Death comes to mind first. How a child is raised is very important to their well being. A good parent will already know this, but some people need to hear it again.

Among the adults, nearly six million are the victims of alcohol and drug abuse. It would be quite a task to take the latter segment out of it, but parents can prevent alcohol and drug abuse in their teen. They can do this by being a little sympathetic and discussing with them freely the future that alcohol and drug abuse has to offer. It is a horrible world with many dangers lurking in the shadows.

Do not be afraid to use a little fear, you know what can become of an addict.

Addictions destroy peoples lives, and parents can help prevent their teenagers from becoming an addict by being involved and staying on the level with them. Try not to embarrass them, and be more like a friend. This way they will feel like being more open with you, thus you will know more about what is going on in your teens life.

Secret Revealed - The Mastery Of Happiness

Happiness seems to elude most people today. It's the one thing that people truly want but can never seem to attain. You may feel the same way. You may feel that you are always searching to acquire happiness but it ends up being that there is no gold at the end of the rainbow.

Why is happiness so hard to find? True happiness, not superficial or short-term happiness, but the happiness that goes so far inside of you that it becomes a part of who you are.

One of the main reasons this is because most people are trying to be happy according to what they see on T.V. or by how they see other people being happy. It's so much about trying to be like someone else because they have the appearance of happiness in their life.

If you are trying to obtain happiness this way, you will never get it. Happiness can't be found in what other people are doing. It can only be found by discovering who you really are and what your passions are in life. Alfred Lord Tennyson explains it like this, 'The happiness of a man in this life does not consist in the absence but in the mastery of his passions.'

If you can master your passions you can master happiness. So the question shouldn't be about how you can become happier but instead, ask yourself what your true passions are. If you think about it, most of the reasons why you are unhappy are because you are doing things that you hate. How can you ever be happy living a life where the vast majority of the things you do are the things that you dread?

Find out what you are passionate about. Once you have at least one thing that you are passionate about, dedicate at least one hour a week to doing that one thing. If you have more time to give to it then give more. As you develop in your passion you will begin to find that inner happiness which isn't dictated by what other people have or do.

Find your passion – find your happiness.